I was sitting in front of Computer 59, when I saw my classmate, J.A. praying on my left side. He is really very studious and he is really performing well in class. And take note: he’s not a Cum Laude, when he was in his college years. He has a girlfriend who is also in San Beda Med school, who excels in her batch as well. They are both doing well and supporting each other.
You know, I somehow felt a sudden pierce in my heart, because I’m a Christian, What?? Am I really?? But Christ is not evident in how I live my life. I don’t go regularly to church anymore. I don’t pray that much anymore. I always feel down. I’m not studying well.
Just simply slacking. Those were the minutes and hours that I could never get back. And just to be clear.. I really do want to become a doctor. But hello?? Are my actions congruent with what I want to attain?
You know, while I was reading the test questions… It took me a long time to fully understand and analyze. I can’t absorb. Maybe because I didn’t study. I did not study. Stupid diba? I was plainly relying on my stock knowledge. But do I have? Haha.
But you know, It doesn’t work that way. I’ve proven it. And guess what, I failed my exam. I lacked 2 points for me to pass. It’s 30% of my final grade.
But even though, I still passed my research subject. So, thank you God!
Then, there’s my Psych LE3, same story. I did not pass. Take note: the questions were about sexuality and about children and homosexuals. How humiliating. The doctor proctor asked me after my test and told me..
“Doc, Maganda? Maganda?” I know he was somehow concerned. But ofcourse, hindi maganda!!! Aaah. I was walking towards the door, when I bumped into the shelf. Then what I said was, “Sorry”. Haha. I went out, but didn’t look back.
Seriously, I need a slap on my face. On both cheeks, pwede?
I’m obviously not happy! Too much talk, not enough action.
So, can you give me two slaps?
Baka sakaling magising na ako sa katotohanan.