Dear songbearer

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JPIA IDOL at UE (December 6, 2012)

Hi! How are you? For sure, you will not be able to see this post that I made, unless you click this new site. I haven’t heard from you for a long time now, since I ran away and you left.

I miss the way you said “heart check” to me, the first time you taught me lessons for the music team. I miss how you constantly reminded me to guard my heart, which then I fell short of doing.

I miss listening to your words, your discreet laughter, your warmth which faded in decrescendo from the distance that you required from me.

Above all, I miss singing with you, eating with you, walking and sitting beside you, laughing and sharing my inmost thoughts with you my songbearer. I wish you sing on my wedding day, if ever I will get married. haha. 🎵

But I know, whatever the reason for this separation that you and I had, which brought me loneliness; maybe for some good reason, it is according to God’s plan. This pruning, this hurting that left me crying for some season in the past because of no settled ending is something that I need to let go of.

I can see you happy and so alive from afar. And that makes me smile. I realized that I can not hold you back from the desires that you want, from the destiny that the Lord calls you to accomplish. And with that, it’s inappropriate for me to keep on asking God why. Because I can see the positivity that happened to your life. You have new friends now, new work, new home to sleep in Manila. Even though, you never told me your new address, it’s just fine. Even though, you are not replying with the messages that I sent you…you’re still in my heart. I miss you. But just like how the sun sets and rises after the night has passed, I still have my hopes up. I’ll definitely see the sun again tomorrow. I wish you well.