How do you love?

How do you love a person, who’s not yet finished loving another person from his or her past.

They say, as Christians.. We must love even those difficult people. But, what if we are the difficult people.

How do we ask God to help us love these people?

I just know deep in my heart, that life is not unfair to those who believe that their deliverance will come. Life is not a misery just because we can’t have the things that we want now. It may not be the right time at the moment, but maybe.. in due time. It will come and God will open doors that no one can shut.

I learned from Martin Luther King Jr., that peace is not merely the absence of tension but the presence of justice.

There is a huge distance between “highest heaven” and “earth”—but it is a distance that Jesus had bridged that night, stepping down from Heaven to be born as a human baby. To bring “peace on earth.”

“Jesus is God, eternal and all-knowing and all-powerful and all-present. But at Christmas, Jesus was born as a human baby. He became fully human and fully God, because only as both human and God could he be the perfect mediator to bridge the divide between heaven and earth and bring peace between God and humanity.” ~ peace on earth ~

You know there is something special with girls that are loved. They seem to glow from within, even if for those who are in a long distance relationship. This same is true with ladies that God loves and protects because they are His. Deep down, they may feel broken and unwanted.. But there’s something special with these ladies. I just can’t figure out. But, God just makes them feel more beautiful even in their brokenness which is a mystery of how God does this.

That in their suffering they just magnify Christ’s saving power with the belief that someday He will come for deliverance, for justice, for love and for peace.

He is our ultimate reward in this crazy world full of indecent obsessions. Jesus, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, our God is alive in each one of us as we battle our day to day challenges.

We must be humble enough to ask God for help with things that are beyond our control. Amen.


Gift wrapping

So, yesterday I was assigned to wrap some of the gifts that’s to be given for some of the employees of the hospital of the Holy Cross.

Here’s the video. It has been cut short already but it was done in 1 hour and 17 minutes and 8 seconds. I was with Dr. RJ. He helped me wrap the gifts. He also was the one who cut via scissors the names. Amazing! ^_^

Merry Christmas! 😊👍

Gift wrapping with Dr. RJ ❤️
I’m with the medical director of the Hospital of the Holy Cross. 🏥


I want to study. I want to go abroad din. I want to be a C.I. too. Hahaha. Ang dami kong gusto gawin, guys.

I’m so tired.

Hindi ko na alam gagawin ko. Nakakapagod pala kapag walang work. Palamunin sa bahay. My mama doesn’t tell that to me, but I just want to contribute too. I don’t like this feeling. I just want to be productive. So please, mercy.

I was reminded with a saying, an idle mind is the devil’s playground. I need to keep myself busy with goals that’s more specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and time– bounded.

What’s more attainable for me at the moment is my Masteral. Please help me God. I also pray for my work. I also pray for my appointment with my doctor.

Redeem me if St. Luke’s will still give me another chance, or if not, just prepare me for my next workplace.

You know everything that’s boggling my mind, all the mistakes I foolishly did. Pardon me. Thank you for your protection. Amen.

White Spaghetti

Haloo ladies and gents, I cooked today a white spaghetti.


  • Spaghetti
  • Coconut milk
  • Mushrooms
  • Garlic
  • Red onion
  • Bagoong
  • Salt
  • Oregano
  • Italian Spices
  • Parmesan Cheese
  • Butter

How to Cook:

  1. Boil the spaghetti noodles on a separate “kaldero”
  2. Dice the garlic, onions and mushrooms
  3. Put butter on heated pan, add garlic and onions until the garlic is golden brown
  4. Add mushrooms, then the coconut milk
  5. Put Parmesan cheese
  6. Put Bagoong
  7. Put salt
  8. Put the Italian spices and oregano
  9. Add the cooked noodles
  10. Let the sauce be absorbed by the noodles by letting it be heated
  11. Add more parmesan
  12. Serve

Yay! So that’s it. I ate the food after I drank soypro in the early morning.

Happy Eating!

A Thrill of Hope: Christmas Fellowship (12/17/2020)

So, I’ll be sharing my experience a while ago. I joined a Christmas fellowship entitled “A Thrill of Hope” on December 17, 2020 with MMC Agape which started 7:45PM onwards. It was participated by various medical professionals from all over the Philippines, from Luzon to Mindanao.

MMC Agape is a non denominational organization of Makati Medical Center that is being involved by various medical professionals in the hospital, including nurses and doctors.

They have a tagline: Love God, Live the Gospel and Serve others.

So, mainly they have a vision of producing Christlike leaders in various areas of the hospital. It was very encouraging.

The emcees were Ayra, and Manell. I like what they call each other. They call themselves sisters, which is cool. They are charge nurses at Makatimed.

The program started with the opening remarks and the heartwarming prayer of Doc Kim Tagayuna. Also, I enjoyed the games that they provided. It was fun. The games were guessing the name title of a song, then they had some riddles too and they also had a short getting to know each other portion for a few minutes only. What I can’t forget from the riddles: Forgive and Forget, A piece of cake. Haha!

The getting to know part have three questions: Name and from where hospital, then, what did I do with last year’s Christmas and what I am hopeful for this 2020’s Christmas. I told them that I am a nurse from St. Luke’s and that I spent somehow Christmas away from my family last year, and that I am hopeful for peace in my mind and my heart for this Christmas. 🙂

I met Doc King Cedeno, Doc Vince, Doc Ishi during the first breakout room, and for some of the other people I met, I forgot their names, because they were not using a video. I think the nurse that I met was a charge nurse of an oncology unit, but I forgot her name. I think it’s Riri.

So, the main speaker was Doc King Cedeno. He is an ENT Doctor at Makatimed, He had two brothers-in-law that are pastors. He shared about Jesus Christ. How he was conceived by Mary and how Joseph still took the responsibility though Mary conceived with the Holy Spirit.

He also shared about the reason why we celebrate Christmas. He shared four reasons, but I only remembered two. First, we celebrate Christmas because of Jesus’s birth and we celebrate Christmas to forgive.

So, he shared about various verses. But what I can remember is this verse (if I am not mistaken) :

We love because he first loved us.

1 John 4:19

I like how he shared about the other verses too. But, most of all, I love how he led us in prayer. It is very heart touching and a good reminder of God’s faithfulness in our lives.

So, they also had a raffle draw. I did not win guys. Haha! But it’s okay. I entered a different number which is not registered under Gcash. Hehe.

Then a song number was sang by kuya Kim Tagayuna. The song is entitled, “We are the reason”. I like how he sang it. He was not wearing eyeglasses, guys. Haha! However, I did not take a video. Sad. I had no copy of the zoom too.

"We Are The Reason"
~ Avalon 

As little children
We would dream of Christmas morn
Of all the gifts and toys
We knew we'd find
But we never realized
A baby born one blessed night
Gave us the greatest gift of our lives

We were the reason
That He gave His life
We were the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

As the years went by
We learned more about gifts
The giving of ourselves
And what that means
On a dark and cloudy day
A man hung crying in the rain
All because of love, all because of love

We were the reason
That He gave His life
We were the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live

I've finally found the reason for living
It's in giving every part of my heart to Him
In all that I do every word that I say
I'll be giving my all just for Him, for Him...

We were the reason
That He gave His life
We are the reason
That He suffered and died
To a world that was lost
He gave all He could give
To show us the reason to live...

He is my reason to live

So, he ended the song with some reminders that we need to be still despite challenges and hardships in life.

They also had special awards. The early bird was Camille, the most participative was Ieana and the person who won the games was Dr. Patsy if I’m not mistaken.

Then, the program was ended with Esther’s prayer. The committee also showed us how faithful God is with MMC Agape with all the fellowships they had in the past and their bible studies. It was amazing. God bless MMC Agape!

So, I will share my learnings with this fellowship. I learned that I am not alone in my Christian walk, that there are other people also having their walk with Christ. I learned that I am a mere human being, capable of making mistakes which does not exempt me from sinning; but, that’s the main reason why we need Christ in our lives, why I need Christ in my life, in as much as Christ is capable of forgiving all our sins, my sins. It is important as well to be reminded how sovereign and loving and amazing God is, that He chose us to be His children and to be His own.

I love this fellowship. The hospital that I represented there is St. Luke’s. Hehe.

So thankful I got a chance to be able to join them. Thank you, Lord.

Photos above taken from Ms. Ayra Aureen Alegre
Christmas Fellowship with MMC Agape

LSI (12/15/2020)

Hi guys!

As you all know, I currently reside now at Calapan City. I went here last December 15, 2020. I will share to you how I traveled to Mindoro from my apartment in Manila.

So, my brother asked me to download an app called “Traze” from Google Play, then I registered there my phone number.

Then, a message was sent to my phone with the category heading of LSI, which has my name under it.

My destination is Sto Nino, Calapan City.

The date of travel validity is from December 15-17, 2020. In which I may travel from 7AM to 4PM.

A message was sent to me, which served as a travel confirmation. They asked me to reply upon receipt of the message. They also told me to travel safe.

On the 15th day of December, 2020. A van texted me that they will pick me up at Piy Margal Street before 10 AM. This van was booked by Paolo. He contacted the driver of the van and made some arrangements. So, after I bought food from Mcdonalds, and when they arrived.. I brought my “maleta”, backpack and my shoulder bag. I sat at the back of the driver’s seat, while I was eating my cheesy eggdesal and hot chocolate.

I was listening to songs with my cellphone’s “Wesing” app. Then, we had two stop overs. One at Pasig and the other was at Batangas. I urinated twice with those stop-overs. Upon reaching the Batangas pier, the van boarded the Starlite Jupiter Ferry. The van parked, then the passengers inside just left the van including me, to find a place to stay from the basement where the car was parked.

I immediately went to the ferries’ 2nd floor; the off limits door, where you can see the sea and the sun almost setting.

At 4PM, I bought a Hopia Roll Mongo and a mineral water, while I was waiting to watch the Lazada live of a colleague in St. Luke’s. She is a social media influencer. Her name is Angel Quilang, a floater nurse too. Her IG account is Morenachiq. She had a lazada live and I watched her doing makeup on her face while I was on the ferry.

A few minutes later, I tried to find a new spot in the Starlite. I went on the center part where most of the chairs are located but it’s open air. I saw a dog with sharp ears and a chain necklace to somehow tell that he is owned. While I was walking towards the captain’s deck, the dog stopped what he was doing and looked at me. I was scared. He was somehow smelling me. My heart skipped a beat. I am really scared of dogs, even for others, they seem harmless.

I have a traumatic experience with dogs because, back when I was a little preschooler at Jusmag Fort Bonifacio, I was bitten by a big dog that was owned by a military personnel, who was living beside our rented house in Fort Bonifacio during my childhood years.

So, back to the Starlite, the dog didn’t bark on me, but he growled, so I was scared. I meant him no harm.

Meanwhile, beside the captain’s deck. I sat down on a bench, and an African family approached me, where I was sitting. The mother was with her little son named Joseph and his husband. They were eating a Pinoy finger food. The mother offered me some food and I ate just one.

So, in that bench, there were three of us sitting. The African mother, her son and I. Then, I asked her if they were on a vacation, they said yes. After a few minutes more, I felt awkward that the African father was still standing and I feel like I took the place where he must supposedly sit, beside his son. I offered him my seat, but he gently refused me. That I should freely continue sitting instead. I was embarrassed, because I don’t know what topics to be discussed anymore with the mother and I was running out of English words. Haha! So, my excuse was.. I told them that I would just go to the comfort room. Just to have some space from them, because I was running out of topics to be discussed.

After I went to the CR. I found a new spot to stay, but before that I went back again to the family that I left just to say goodbye to the child and the family I talked to. I told them that I found a new spot. I said farewell to the child.

I’m thankful for that time. There were babies and toddlers on board the Starlite Jupiter and I was just observing them, until a little boy came across my view. He was a toddler, just walking in the aisle, holding a Skyflakes cracker. He was eating it, when suddenly it fell on the ground. He did not cry when the cracker fell. But when he caught my gaze on him, he somehow stooped down just to get the cracker. However, I didn’t blink an eye at him, I was staring at him and shook my head from left to right, then he started crying.

I just want to tell him, “Sorry, little boy, but I don’t want you to eat it because it’s already dirty.” But, I just looked at him, he cried towards his mom. I was such a bully. Sorry po. Hehe.

And so, after three hours, we reached Calapan Pier. Upon reaching Calapan Pier, my brother Paolo and his girlfriend was waiting for me. But I went to them, after I’ve shown my LSI to the deck at Calapan’s pier in trade for a stub to be given at the Barangay office for the following day.

The next day, I went to the barangay office and submitted my stub with Paolo. Thank God that his girlfriend knows how to drive for us to be there.

The barangay counselor, asked me to monitor my temperature daily, and that’s what I was doing for the next succeeding days until my fourteenth day of staying in Calapan just to monitor if I have symptoms of Covid. They are texting me daily just to be reminded.

How to Resign at St. Luke’s part 2


I have already let the employee health clinic sign my clearance, and I’ve already submitted my medical records at the Medical Records Management office, which is located at 5 West Oncology unit.

Then, I have already let the LEAD or the Learning Education and Development Department sign my paper.

I have also let the accounting department sign (both property and general) but my clearance is still in the payroll. They asked me to call back on Wednesday next week, or they will update me as soon as they have already managed what’s left of me to pay or something about payroll.

So, right now.. I am still waiting. Guys, I have still not finished cleaning my small room.

So I guess that’s what I need to do now, while waiting for St. Luke’s. Sayang, St. Lukes Medical Center is really a nice hospital, it’s world class. But, they just let go of me easily. Hahaha. I also like that every employee in the hospital has a g-suite account in gmail.

It is one of the things that I really like in St. Luke’s, my email address, which was already deleted by the management.

Also, they still gave me sweldo the last month.. although I did not receive an email. So, still thankful.

Deliberate disobedience

I am just deliberately disobeying my doctor. Sabi niya, wag ko daw sabihin sa iba na nagttake ako ng medications, dahil sa stigma. What’s gonna happen because of what I did?

But, I’m telling this now.

Also, the reason I was really depressed.. Kasi sabi ng isang classmate ko sakin dati. I don’t know if he really is a friend, I’m a false prophet daw. What if I am really a false prophet? Since I told him, na magkakababy kami. I was so obsessed with him, many years ago. Naturn off siya sakin. So he called me a false prophet.

Yun lang. Do you know what happened to the false prophet?

He was thrown to the fires of hell as what I’ve read in the Bible. I don’t know if it is a dangerous thing, reading the bible alone.

Another reason that I was depressed, my girlfriends. My most closest friends. They just left me. Yun lang. Mas grabe yung heartbreak ko with girls than boys. You know.